Friday's Forgotten Commandment

Thou shalt not clip thy finger or toe nails in any room where thou regularly entertainest company, or preparest thy food, or eateth thy sandwiches, and leave thy clippings lying about or hiding under seat cushions, but thou shalt promptly dispose of all thy clippings into thy garbage.

Big News!

Guess what, guys? I won the lottery - in Malaysia! I didn't even know I had entered the lottery in Malaysia, but I just got an email telling me that I won!

I'm pretty excited. I mean, I'm obviously not going to collect it (we don't use money here in Heaven, remember?) but it's still pretty cool that I won. What are the odds?

Appreciate the Little Things

You know, being The Creator and everything, I can appreciate a really cool invention when I see it. I also know what it's like to be taken for granted.

So it hurts when I find out that most of you don't even know the name of the man who invented the single most important piece of technology in the world today, without which you would not be able to live the lives of luxury you've grown so accustomed to.

So today, I want all of you to think about and be grateful for Mr. Samuel B. Fay, without whom you would not have the paper clip.

Footprints

Sorry I haven't weblogged in a while. I have so much to catch up on!

You know how in the last little bit, when you were trying to overcome all the stressful emotions that come with the holidays, you sometimes felt like there were only one set of footprints in the sand? Well, that's probably because you were walking all by yourself, unless you were vacationing with me in Cabo, because my footprints were all up and down those pristine beaches!

Today's Forgivable Sin Is....

... breaking your mom's favorite vase, even though she always said, 'Don't play ball in the house!'

Friday's Forgotten Commandment

Thou shalt not leave little bits of toothpaste foam in the bottom of the sink, but thou shalt instead splash water about the drain sufficiently until all parts of the foam have been washed away.

Are Your Loins Sufficiently Girded?

Go here.