I Will Never Understand Moses

I think maybe I've given some of you the wrong impression with the way I talk about Moses on this blog. The Missus pointed out to me that perhaps I've come across as a bit cruel, and she asked me to make a clarification.

While it's true that I have a difficult relationship with Moses, mostly because how can I possibly be expected to understand somebody who turns up the volume every time Patrick Swayze's "She's Like the Wind" comes on?, he is still one of my children. Even though he's fairly stupid and annoying and he doesn't comb his beard very stylishly, I still Created him and gave him Life.

Therefore, I am contractually obligated to love him just like I love everybody else. It's one of those laws of the Universe that I can't break. No matter how much I want to.

Oh, and how I want to.